Most of you know that I am writing a book. It has turned out to be more difficult then I had anticipated? Primarily for two reasons, One, it calls for a discipline not necessary in writing a blog, and to me, discipline has always been a dirty word? But the second reason is the more compelling of the two, and it is because I have already written it once! The initial writing took place during a 90 day stay at a Christian Rehabilitation center for people with substance abuse problems, in other words, Addicts! During this time, all I wanted to do is write, and so I wrote whenever and wherever I could. I couldn't stop writing! It was as if my mind was purging itself from all of the self inflicted horror? It became my passion, something that I just had to do, and the words seemed to fly onto the paper, my pen seeming like it had a mind of its own?
The really frustrating part for me, is that the initial book is here in this house, spread out all over the place in boxes with other writings! So I figured that it would be easier, if I just wrote it again? Afterall, I still remember the stories quite well. I told myself that it would be better this time, as my grammar had to be much improved from what it was then? That may well be, as I am about three chapters in, and it reads real well!
The process of writing it this time is much different, as this time there is no passion, and it has become like a job? The urgency too that I felt then as now is quite different also. Now my mind is fixed on finishing the manuscript, paying whatever it is to have it be published, and get it on the market!
Not for any lofty goal like making my literary mark, but rather because I am tired of being broke!
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